One week down, One more to go

since my detainment last week a number of things have happened that have hindered my progress but also shown me how much I am loved and being rooted to succeed.

Money I was expecting from my parole savings has been lost. Not lost forever but sort of lost in the bureaucratic red tape of Sacramento. This money was supposed to help me move into a place of my own once leaving the parolee house. which in turn has left me like the state of California. My bank account has dried up, my credit is maxed out, and I am practically living as a homeless person until my next paycheck.

A few people have really helped me out during this ordeal. Mainly, my mom, girlfriend, bosses, and a co worker. Because of my plight, I have to sleep either in my delivery van or at the baker's bed located inside the business I work in. Tough times don't last but tough people do. I could easily go back to my old ways and pick up several hindered dollars to get me through until my next pay or when my Sacramento check arrives but my mind is in a very different place. so, I have to be a bit uncomfortable for a few weeks. When I went to jail, my belongings disappeared. everything except the laptop and ipod which I pawned in order to pay off any fine I could in order to stay out of jail for the weekend. It worked.

I would just really like to thank mom, my girlfriend, my bosses, the hippy, and all of the support I have received through personal messages and facebook comments. Surprisingly, using drugs in order to ease the stress and low self esteem I feel right now hasn't entered my mind. hallelujah!! This ordeal will be over shortly and I am experiencing what thousands of people throughout the country are going through now. Thank you so much, you can never imagine how much this has boosted mu spirit and reminds me of the long way I have come.

I am still in a great state of joy over being off of parole, and I no longer have one foot in and one foot out of the doors of prison.

I had a great weekend traveling to Half Moon Bay and watching the Sea Lions on the Beach. Very relaxing, and I spent it with someone I care a great deal about, although she is probably not feeling as strong as she did for me a few weeks ago. I can't blame her.

so, I will struggle and suffer a bit more for a short while but after that, look out world. I might be the next Trump but more likable and less greedy.

Te ride still continues and I am enjoying it. ( Even the tough parts
) which will be posted soon.

Until then

My next post will deal with the difficulties I am having dealing with relationships without the use of drugs or alcohol which is all ne territory for me. One statement made in my direction bothered me stating that I might be incapable of being flexible and open to change. If they could only see the changes made over the last 11 years. Unbelievable how sensitive my body has become. I am sure if you have been an addict like me in the past you know exactly what I am talking about because I spoke with someone about this subject. Same exact difficulties were experienced by this person. Hmmmm. I'll have to do some research on this. Anyway, Life is great. and it's going to be even greater. Love, Peace, Harmoney, and un derstanding.

The Decemberists-The Wanting Comes in Waves